Monday, April 4, 2011


Once I began reading about introversion, I kept coming across an aspect of the trait that rang so true with me I almost jumped out of my chair.


It is the concept that an introvert does not necessarily dislike people, but an introvert tends to require time to rest after engaging in social interaction with a group of people. Quite frankly, it sounded pathetic to me as a 25 year old girl. I should want to be out until all hours at a bar, shouldn't I? At the same time, I realized "recharging" reflects exactly how I behave, and have behaved my entire life. How many weekends where I spent more than one night out with family or friends was I exhausted after? Countless. It is not that I don't want to socialize. Trust me, I do! I just like to do so in small quantities. I crave alone time after a night out. Me, myself, and the TV or a book. Going without my alone time results in what I like to think of as social shutdown where while at a social gathering I will likely sit in silence, only responding when being spoken to as to not be rude.

It honestly feels like an instinctual reaction. As nutty as it sounds, I physically cannot muster up the effort to engage in small talk if I haven't had time to myself. No matter how much I try to pep talk myself (anyone else do this?) or try to snap out of it, I can't. Anything that requires consecutive days of socialization (being in a wedding, for instance) is a source of stress.

Now that I understand this is a typical reaction for an introvert, I don't think of myself as strange for feeling the need to be alone at times. My goal is to make sure that I make plans accordingly, and not feel guilty saying no to certain social functions so that I can enjoy the social events I do attend as much as possible without entering social shutdown mode.

Has anyone else experienced this?


  1. Yes! I am so happy to have stumbled on your blog- I know just what you mean!

    I think it's because we put so much energy into our social interactions that we are completely wiped afterwards...and that's not a bad thing.

    Good for you for redeeming introverts!

  2. Yes Emily, that's exactly it. You put so much energy into being "on" during a social interaction, that it literally exhausts you. You said it perfectly.

    And it's not a bad thing. I think that is exactly what is so misunderstood. We are widely mistaken for being rude or antisocial.

    Thanks for reading :)

  3. I actually was introduced to you via your 20 something blog. Since I don't qualify for that group I followed you here.

    I have been blogging since late 2008 about introverts in business. Tips, ideas, techniques, all for introverts although I must tell you, many extroverts chime in on my posts and like the ideas.

    Your point about the misconceptions - yes siree they are out there in abundance but I see them ever so slowly eroding.

    Keep up your good work in adding to the truth of introversion.

  4. It's good to hear that the misunderstandings are fading, especially in the business world. I am looking forward to checking out your blog. Thanks for sharing!